Summary of the script today
|12th October: My spiritual self is dividing into two to remove the darkness from my physical self||
|13th October: The darkness brought me to my knees threatening to destruct the Universe etc. if I decided to give up||
|14th October: We are on the edge of succeeding to remove the darkness||
|15th October: Receiving approvals of the Universe to continue building the new world order on basis of my work||
12th October: My spiritual self is dividing into two to remove the darkness from my physical self
Dreaming of my father almost stopping my/our journey and existence
Yesterday evening when I went to bed I was given another variant making it difficult for me to fall asleep, which was that I started freezing and we know which made me put duvet no. 2 on top of me and even though this should be more than enough for me keeping the warmth, I was still freezing – and it was not cold in my bedroom (!) – and therefore I decided also to put on a sweater and this took away the freezing making me fall asleep eventually and during the night of course I woke up sweating because normally I only need one duvet and therefore I had to remove duvet no. 2 and take off my sweater and we know just to tell you in another way that my sleeping is still not good to put it mildly and we know making me “tired” also today you know.
- I had a dream where I was at a party with my father and his wife Kirsten. In the basement Prince Henrik of Denmark – the Queen’s husband – wanted to show me souvenirs from his trips in Asia and among other things he showed me a wooden box including an embryo of a bird and three eggs, which made me feel disgusted. Upstairs at the dinner table at my place stood a bottle of German white wine of really good quality and I noticed that wine has been poured from the bottle. My good friend Kirsten sits next to me.
- The Prince is from this “dream on” a new symbol of my father the same way as the Queen is a symbol of my mother. The souvenirs of the bird and the eggs say that my father because of his actions was close to make it impossible for me – and herewith the world – to continue our journey and existence. The wine says that the Source has now opened for the stream of energy to the world building the road for me and all of us, which is not without importance you know!
In one year I will become my old self with the full wisdom and power of “God”
When I woke up it was with the song “it only takes a minute” by Take That and the other day I was “coincidently” thinking that it is now two years ago I attended the Skanderborg music festival and it seemed to me that time has gone so quickly that one year is like one minute – which is also an old symbol the Council has given me for years now – and this song says that in one year I will become my old self with all of the wisdom and power of “God” and we know ALL OF ME REALLY and I know this is in “one more minute” from now and we know Lars Muhl, I liked some of your music very much too and I know about your spiritual journey but I have had no time to read your books.
My telephone stopped working because of negative energy, which is still being sent to me
For several weeks now my mobile phone has had increasingly difficulties working, where it simply has turned off the light of the screen many times requiring me to take out and re-insert the battery to make it work again and yesterday the screen was “blinking” in a new way made by the Council when I opened it and we know this morning it had simply “given up” (!) – it is now “completely dead” – because of the still immense negativity coming to me from people misunderstanding and abandoning me – and we know it is my closest family who is giving me the most of this negativity because of their feelings and because of their spiritual strength, hence the dreams of recent days – and this meant that I was sleeping over this morning “deliberately” and we know as an act of the darkness trying to stop my plans to continue climbing up the inside of my house all the way to the top and because of this I was first at the park at 08.00 instead of 07.30 this morning and we know so it is.
The next is that it is not a good time to be forced to buy a new telephone when I really don’t have much money and we know I am struggling to make the little money I have this month to last all month – still rejecting all kind of temptations on a daily basis to have a pizza there, cappuccino there, new clothes and better quality of food and wine etc. and we know I have not bought anything for myself for more than one year – and still I need to be careful not to be tempted to buy a new telephone with all of its “exciting features” – which is something that tempts many and we know sometimes overpowering people taking away their reasoning – with money taken from my “savings” reserved for LTO until the 1st February and we know on the other hand I need to have a telephone working and a “notebook” so we will have to see what I decide to do one of the next days – if I will buy a new or used telephone.
I had to leave the park early because of total exhaustion
This morning at the park I used less than an hour finalising the last part of the last row at the bed and we know my partner Thomas returned from his illness – he and Tom has been “sick” for more than one week before both now are back and we know as part of the recent game because they are two of the strongest people at the park, who are motivating me and therefore helping me to come through and when they were not here, it was more difficult for me – and we were asked to mow the lawns and no problem because Thomas would use the big commercial lawn mower – which you can sit on and drive making the work easy – and I would use the hand driven lawn mower for the small lawns so no problems there but it showed out that the big commercial lawn mower was not working and this changed the game really because now we were two men having two hand driven lawn mowers for let us say “a very big lawn” – and we know I was thinking that even though there is much grass to be mowed, which seems impossible to do before starting the work, it is simply to start the work which is then what I did at approx. 09.00 and from here until 14.00 I was walking and pushing the lawn mower, which was heavy to push and becoming heavier by the minute, and I had one lunch and one coffee break and did the washing-up too – as I often do because it is difficult finding “volunteers” when Tom is not here – and we know giving breaks of a total of approx. one hour and just saying that other than this I was constantly walking and pushing this increasingly heavy burden for four hours and we know Thomas was doing a fine job, but he did not have energy to work all of the time as I did and at 13.30 he simply had to leave the park because of exhaustion and I was hoping that I could finalise the rest of the day until approx. 14.30-14.45 but at 13.50 I was completely exhausted too and therefore I also received approval to leave the park and we know totally beaten blue black and on my way out one said “today you don’t need to go to fitness” and I told her that I would go home to take a nap and then go to fitness afterwards because this was my plan – and we know I made it home and I took the nap and we know I woke up at 17.00, where I should have started Yoga at the Fitness Centre and we know which was totally impossible to do because I was both late – I had no alarm, when the telephone was not working – and also now because I was aching all over my body after waking up.
Again today I decided to use mind control to keep away negative speech coming to me.
My spiritual self is dividing into two to remove the darkness from my physical self
I also decided to visit the Centre for Wisdom and Compassion again and this evening it was a well-read Dane speaking about taking responsibility of your own life – which many Danes “forget” to do blaming others and the community of their situation – and we know other subjects too and for some reason or another I had difficulties to go to the deep level I am normally allowed to go to when meditating but I was shown a tongue of salt leading to a wider and wider land of salt, which I am approaching – the salt is the symbol of the Universe and EVERYTHING there is – and at the beginning of the meditation I was told that one person will become “the good” and another person will become “the bad” – or the light and the darkness – and it made me wonder what this meant and who should become “the bad” and we know it took me some time of confusion and speculation until I understood the only logical answer, which is that my inner self will divide into two beings where one will be “the good”, which is the one I will be in contact with, and “another part of me” and we know separate part of me will become “the bad” taking the darkness with him without contact to my physical self and we know until the light will be so strong that it has lit up the entire world and all people, which is then when the darkness completely will vanish and this is how it is.
This is also as a condition for me to move on closer to the centre of my home – or “the top” of it if you wish – and I write this because the day before yesterday at the Cultural Yard in Helsingør I was given some speech, which I did not fully understand at the time which was that I was asked if I could approve what the Council had prepared where this new site was the physical world symbolising the new buildings of the spiritual world and I said that I would have approved everything they had prepared even if they had only prepared one percent of what they did and at the same time I was myself going through an approval process where I was asked if I was the light or the darkness arriving (?) – remember the darkness being strong this day as another part of the game – and this is how it is and why it is now the right decision not only to have the darkness separated inside of me but to remove this part of me into a separate spiritual being as mentioned before.
During the meditation I also felt that both the darkness and the Council are now closer to me than ever before and the darkness put the words so directly into my mouth that I just “had to” accept being together with a beautiful woman – the “Devil in disguise” you know – and at the same time I was also giving the idea that the Council would save me – and what about the Source (?) – and even though this was closer than ever before I decided until the end to refuse what today was an almost impossible to refuse “request” and we know what would have happened if I had given in?
During the day I was given visions of maybe 20-25 of my friends and old colleagues and the feeling that these are friends, who at the moment are being prepared to be woken up as my “special friends” and I noticed some surprises too as the world will get to know.
13th October: The darkness brought me to my knees threatening to destruct the Universe etc. if I decided to give up
More “demands” from the darkness
This morning at my day off from the park I was given the same “requests” or “demands” from the darkness as yesterday evening, which was almost impossible to resist because the darkness took for granted that it could continue doing what it wanted to do – but I resisted – and I started thinking about Yoga, which I should have started doing yesterday at the Fitness Centre again and because of this I have not done Yoga for now 10 days and I thought if this is still of importance for me to do in order to remove the negativity coming to me from primarily my closest family misunderstanding me and when I took a bath this morning it became easier to come through and afterwards I decided to do Yoga at home and we know it is still very difficult for me to do but let me say that afterwards when I lay on my bed in the clean energy, which it creates, it is the best feeling I know of and we know “from this moment on” the “requests” from the darkness disappeared – at least for a few hours!
As a matter of good sake I can also say that I am still most of the time given a limping feeling to my right foot and “marks” around the foot at the place where the sock stops and we know I am looking forward to this feeling removing too – which by the way is also a déjà vue feeling I remember from my childhood.
My spiritual self has started being divided into two
I was shown a vision where I saw the Devil as a small boy cycling on a small three wheeled bicycle, he was followed by an elephant and we know taking him away from me and he wanted to bring tobacco and other “old pleasures” with him, which he was not allowed to do, and we know this is a vision about the darkness, which is now being removed from me because the work to separate my spiritual self into two beings has started and we know “give it some days” is the message to me and so it is.
And “a new day has come” and herewith a new action plan including writing the script of today and yesterday etc. and we know as usual I am thinking – as I do on a daily basis – will I be able to carry out my plan also today (?) and we know more or less impossible is what it has seemed to be every single day and we know Stig, this is the feeling, which also will be taken away from you when the darkness will leave you.
Buying a new telephone as a symbol of “God” coming through Hell
I have used some hours to look at different new or used telephones, I have had a look at my budget and I found out that I could buy a used Sony-Ericson telephone from approx. 2007 for 250-300 DKK or a new HTC Wildfire smart phone for 99 DKK including 399 DKK per month for 6 months – this is often how telephones are sold in Denmark today – and I decided to buy the HTC phone because it is the cheapest to pay for today, because the first invoice of 3 times 399 DKK is to be paid the 1st February 2011 where I will no longer pay taxes and where I should be able to afford it – did I hear the word “normal life” coming too (?) – and we know because this smart phone in my opinion is the best combination of price and quality, which is what I am always looking for and we know basically it can do the same as its big brothers and competitors, which may cost 2-3 times as much.
And we know I had no idea that I would decide to buy this telephone but there may be some other PEOPLE – which we like to be called too – who knew that I would take this decision and we know to buy this particular brand and model – in comparison I believe Iphone is far too expensive and inflexible but they have a fantastic design and we know combine the content of HTC and the design of Iphone and you have the best of two worlds in my opinion – and the name of the model is WILDFIRE and we know “WILD FIRE” is what I was to go through later today as a symbol of when the darkness is at its strongest and we know out of the darkness comes goodness and yes this is just another way of putting it and this is really also about A BETTER TELEPHONE as a symbol of a better “spiritual signal” coming to me, which the Council sometimes now simply feels and looks like being in a world where I am too (!) and so it is.
Meshack is building up his family again
The other day I asked Meshack how he is doing and since I believe the readers of my scripts would like to be kept updated I have decided to bring his answer here – thank you very much Meshack and thank you for doing your absolutely best also in relation to all of your children.
Here is his email:
Hi there, i hope you are okay and the same is with us here. I have settled with my friend and taken back my wife and my child and we are united again. Health wise, am still not feeling well because i have already been diagnosed with blood pressure due to stress about the debts and the kind of mistreatment i have gone through.
I have started tracking my lost children and i already have three with me but am still looking for the rest and i hope by month end i will have all of them back with me but the challenge is how to feed them but i hope with little support i will manage.
Doing a new impossible run at Fitness World
This afternoon I was planning to do bodybiking at Fitness World as a variation to running, which is really difficult for me to do at the moment, but for the second time now they called me to say that they have not finalised this feature yet and we know I was “this close” to cancel my planned visit because of this and because I knew that I had “no energy” to run instead today but somehow I managed to get there and we know to start running and today it was really with the attitude that I did not believe that I would be able to run for even two minutes but you know about taking it step by step and the first two minutes became 10 minutes and increasing and during the run I was tempted much by what I thought was the light to give my thoughts free – as I have been for days now – and we know I believed that behind the negativity I would find the light which would “save me” from any attempts of the darkness but when I did this and accepted that the darkness could do whatever it wanted to do, the darkness became so strong as I cannot even give you an understanding of, but it frightened me very much and we know again so much that I wondered if I would be able to defeat it this time – still the same threats with words and also answers put in my mouth, which is really impossible to resist and now even more – and with this happening at the same time as loud young people next to me did their best with INSPIRATION to break my rhythm to stop running I kept on running and the last 10 minutes was one of those “I don’t know how I did it but I did it” and we know I was also told after the first 10 minutes of running that this was energy given to my mother and from here I was told that I gave energy to Meshack and we know others too – this is what it is about to make sure that all of my “special friends” will make it. And I did this run thinking that this period of “1-2 weeks”, which I am going through now is about giving more energy than what I have – at a new all time high level compared to my sufferings – to help my spiritual self separating into two to remove the darkness from me so this is what I am doing and you may call it to the extreme here.
The darkness brought me to my knees threatening to go back to the destruction of the Universe etc. if I decided to give up
From Fitness World I went directly with the train to Lama Yönten and the speech was very negative and again I was thinking if I really could handle this inhuman pressure, which today was far above my limits and we know there is no alternative but I had the feeling that I wish I would have been able to put it all behind me – to forget all about it and live a life without fear and suffering – and at the Metro train later towards Frederiksberg I was approached by a very drunk man, who told me that he was driving the train in the wrong direction and that he needed to go back and when this happened – where I was shortly doubting my self because of the immensely strong darkness given to me constantly – I was told that if I should give up, I would return with the train towards the darkness and again I was told about Hitler, Nixon and the darkness entering the “new” Universe meaning destruction as a result and I was shown an almost complete figure of Buddha and asked if this is what I wanted to destruct and also that this is still about the death or survival of my mother and all of this was far above all of what I could take really and I could only do what was beyond my best saying that I will never give up and we know try to imagine that you have a MUCH stronger direct voice and feeling within you, which you cannot stop and are resisting, which was impossible to do today and which I only did with my absolutely outmost as I have done only very few times before. Not the nicest feeling you know.
Lama Yönten speaking about ”freedom” and ”the home of God”
Again we had a very good meeting with the Lama – also thank you very much to the very fine and dedicated work of the translator, whom I like very much, because without you it would be impossible to get the same out of these meetings and just to tell you that the Lama speaks only a little Danish and English, which makes direct conversation with him almost impossible – and the Lama spoke about compassion coming through meditation and philosophy, and happiness through avoiding suffering and MUCH more and he was inspired today to speak about “birds flying from an island” and we know he was talking about “freedom” and “the home of God” as symbols, which we are still approaching because of my decision at the train to continue never giving up and it is still about not having the darkness to “attach” to me as “bad habits” and about rejecting all of its temptations and you know which I have now done what may be “millions of times” almost without any breaks through the 4½ years it has communicated with me directly and so it is.
We also did small meditation exercises where each attendant was asked to count a short meditation with 21 in- and exhales before stopping and we know when the others had reached 21, I had reached between 4-7 and just saying that a slow and deep breath is what is coming naturally to me and bringing me the deepest calm and concentration when meditating.
On my way home from the Lama in the train I was told by the darkness that ”we have been rejected all of the time, there is nothing to do, we give up” and I was glad to hear this and we know looking forward to the day when this finally will come through and we know when my mind will be locked on positivity/objectivity that is.
Dreaming of helicopters – servants of the light – crashing and burning
Again tonight I had a bad night’s sleep and at 03.30 I woke up with the following dream:
· I was playing a game and told by my competitor that I could not loose the first game of drinking wine and then I saw the game continuing where I together with other people was brought to a place on a field with very many helicopters, where one of the nice ladies partly undressed and afterwards I saw a helicopter crashing and igniting the others too and I saw people running for their lives and when I afterwards saw them standing in a line, I was told that they had lost their working capacity because of this – and when I woke up I was told that “this is what we are going through to become sacred”.
o We know Stig this dream came after the experience yesterday afternoon in the Metro train and my goal is still to keep ALL “helicopters” from crashing and we know burning too and this is to say that I have decided not to allow anything to happen to ANY of my “special friends”.
The lawn mower was self-propelled!!!
This morning at the park I realised that I did a mistake Tuesday when I was pushing the lawn mower forward manually – sweating in a t-shirt only (!) – because Thomas told me that I did not need to push the mower faster than its self-propelled speed because this would be far to hard for us to do (!) and eeeehhhh did it have a self-propelled speech (?) and yes indeed it had, there was a handle on the mower and when pushing this, the mower started driving by itself and we know this would of course have been nice to know Tuesday but on the other hand it would have meant that I did not have to give more than maybe 1/10 of the energy I decided to give as “someone” here helps me to write and we know the others in the park better understood why I was sweating so much when I told them about my “stupidity” and we know “how could you carry on” was one question I heard and we know the answer is because of attitude and will power and not because of physical energy and so it is.
I continued mowing the lawn the first four hours today and it was NO PROBLEM at all to do when the mower drove by itself and we know this was only “a walk in the park” really almost without using energy in comparison with Tuesday and we know in the afternoon the mower decided to stop working (!) and from here I started to do the second round at the bed and we know not with the greatest motivation to be honest with you and I was thinking that this is symbolising that we have now started to fine-tune the new Universe and this is really how it is.
We are on the edge of succeeding
During the day – and for some days now – it has been impossible for me to hear when it is the light or the darkness, which has been speaking to me and this has made me take the attitude that I will simply continue doing my best waiting for what will happen and I am still thinking of this period of 1-2 weeks I am going through now and this is one of the toughest of all periods I have gone through.
I felt the spirit of Lama Yönten coming to me several times during the day and I was told that “we are on the edge of succeeding” – i.e. removing the darkness – and this gave me the belief that if I was to give up now, we would still make it to “safe ground” and we know maybe by breaking my leg, which is another feeling I have been given strongly for days now that this – and more – could be an opportunity too if I did not have enough energy to give in other ways and we know I have given the Council and my inner self the authorisation to do what they believe is the best.
For days in the back ground I have felt Virgin Mary with me most of the time and we know really as a “hostage” of what could start to happen if I gave up.
I was told today that when the Devil will disappear, this is also when my special friends will be woken up spiritually – this is how it fits together.
My mother has been in pain and this is why I was in pain too
This afternoon I spoke to my mother again and she told me that her situation has been very bad because she woke up this morning with inflammation all over and it showed out that she had received a big inflammation at one of the operation incisions, she was given and this was VERY painful for her – so this is what I was given yesterday when going through my pain and also today when the darkness was strong too – and she was “lucky” to get a time already this afternoon at the hospital where she met a nice doctor who helped to remove all of the inflammation and to make sure that it does not come back and we know I was very happy to hear that my mother will now be out of pain and we know making her sleep much better than if she had not seen the doctor and we know this is how it is and after this call in the late afternoon I understood why my suffering had started to decrease a few hours earlier and so it is.
David thanking God for his life despite of living every day at a time
Today I was also happy to receive a very nice and warm email from my friend David in Kenya who among others wrote this:
“I thank God also for letting me get on with life, seeing bright days each year should not be taken for granted. God makes all things beautiful for us, that we may find joy in living for we are in this world for but just for great purposes. This year has taught me a lot; The patience of living every day at a time, Giving thanks for all things, Putting into consideration what God has done for me.”
I am happy to see his faith, positivity and patience when waiting for a better life to come but it makes me sad that the Devil has been so powerful in the world – because of how the world behaves (!) – that David has not yet been able to live what we could simply call a “normal life” and we know if God easily could have made the Devil disappear, you would have had a “normal life” a long time ago David, but we are still moving on with the plan to get normal life and God showing all of his power and we know despite of the very strong resistance we have met. “Don’t give up”, my friend and please keep your faith. Thank you very much indeed for your nice email and your thoughts – please give all of my best and warmest regards to your dear ones.
15th October: Receiving approvals of the Universe to continue building the new world order on basis of my work
Dreaming of receiving approvals of the Universe to continue building the new world order on basis of my work
Again tonight I did not have a good sleep – not surprisingly (?) – with this dream:
- I am with my family and Jeffrey Immelt, the CEO of General Electric, is going to hold a speech at 20.00 on the television channel TV2 Charlie. At 20.45 it is the Danish Prime Minister Nyrup Rasmussen who speaks about Judgment Day with a new world order coming and that all approvals of the Universe have been collected. From here I see my mother driving the car with the family inside, the car is driving very fast but safely through a futuristic looking Copenhagen. My mother says “my God, you have been telling us the truth all of the time” and I reply “Yes, I could never do anything else”. Later I am in a very big church, where Pope Benedict introduces me and I see people coming up to me lying on their knees in front of me and I ask them if this is what they would do in front of their parents and I am surprised to hear one person answering yes.
- We know I was glad and here moved to tears to receive this dream because I understand this as approval given from the Universe really to what I have written – thank you my friends – and we know to agree on these books to be the foundation of the new world order and we know “I’m not perfect”, so it can be improved and we know corrected in the future and so it is.
I could really continue working until the end – also fighting the darkness
At the park today I continued doing the second round of the bed and we know it is not what motivates me the most to do – this is the “gift” I am born with, I am much better doing “office work” and communication – but still I do my best both to find joy and to produce quality in the work I do and we know using discipline and today and the last couple of days I have received this line many times: “Could he really continue” (?) and we know it could be understood two ways – in a wrong way with annoying sexual temptations of the Devil – and in a good way, which is what I was told today, which is that I kept on working at the park until the end “against all odds” doing my best with all of the tasks I have been given and we know at the same time as I continued writing my scripts, exercising and we know keeping away the darkness, which was really VERY difficult this week and so it is.
Today the Devil showed himself as a now grown up man telling his ”supporters” – my own family and friends (!) – that his goal was to take me over and hereafter “never to look back” but that he has to give up because I always refused him – there were no openings and he has earlier acted as “surprised” that my army only consisted of me – and despite of this I still had an average day of suffering with negative speech trying to attach to me, which I had to resist.
I don’t like the Devil inside of people!
For a very long time the darkness has given me “automatically” and very directly negative comments about all people I have met – also when speaking to them (!) – and we know which has taken my best to resist and correct every single time and we know which has also been difficult to do when the truth is that people have not always shown a good behaviour or attitude and this has let me to say for some days now what is objective correct: I don’t like the side of people showing a WRONG behaviour, attitude and language of the Devil and hereby saying that I DON’T LIKE THE DEVIL (!) and we know when the Devil is gone, all of this wrong behaviour ect. will disappear with him and we know so people will show themselves with all of the goodness they possess, which I simply love and what I am trying on a daily basis to find in people behind the darkness and so it is!
The Council performed a theatre as the darkness to attract the darkness in order to remove the darkness!
At 12.00 I went home to write the script of today and yesterday and I also took a nap and really because this is the end of the week and I was feeling VERY tired and we know also because I wanted to feel better before starting bodybiking at 16.30 at Fitness World, which I had promised my self to do and we know which I then did and at this session I was told by the Council that they have been performing a theatre the last days given me the worst “darkness” to attract the darkness and now the darkness has “found out” that it chose wrong because I am as you know the light and I was shown when cycling that the coat of the Devil as a result of this was now taken of me and at the same time I felt “the right feeling” coming from the Council from the left side of me with love and also showing the love symbol and we know the one from Prince and I was also given the lyrics “and I’ll probably feel a whole lot better when you’re gone” here played by Tom Petty and almost Jeff Lynne you know and just saying that I thought I was “the closest” to get taken over by the darkness during the week and we wonder all of us was I really (?) or would the Council have saved me if I had given up (?) and we know ARE YOU AWAKE MY DEAR COUNCIL MEMBERS (?) and we know let us take Monty this time and we know the spirit of Tobias because you have not been working much my friend in relation to these scripts and we know we are all here as I hear and so it is what would you like to ask me my friend and we know what would have happened if I “gave up” at the Metro station the other day (?) and we knooooow and do you remember this (?) and we know Monty is really only saying that he was also working with all of the Council members when this was said and we know as busy as the rest of us but no and not yes and that is to say that …. – the words which are now coming to my fingers are coming from my brain without knowing from where they come and we know where do the words come from and if they are not from me, are they then from my own spiritual self or maybe from a member of the Council and we know all of us and every single of us and see you later alligator and we know you don’t Stig so therefore CONGRATULATIONS is now what we say and the answer is really “blowing in the wind” and this is the best I got and so it is – and as you can see now I take over as Stig directly again but the feeling is “almost” the same as before but as you noticed, I was not given much help answering this question so this is probably how we would like this story to be – who knows what would have happened if I had given up?
And when I came home I noticed that the negative speech of the darkness (?) decreased and I even noticed for a few minutes that I did not even think about the annoying darkness and we know which has happened VERY rarely for years and so it is – it was almost as my life was before 2006 when the direct speech of the darkness started.