Introduction

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Summary of this page

  • Writing this memo on my suffering is part of my worst sufferings because of extreme sufferings, feelings of disgust and impatience given to me while writing it – and only having the energy of a 90 year old man (!) – with the deeper purpose to bring energy for the resurrection of my previous self, Jesus, to become my new self.
  • The strong voice of people and poor communication skills made it “impossible” for people to understand that I was suffering more than anyone in history and that I was more dead than alive when working harder and better than most, because when I did this, they thought that I had to be doing fine!
  • My family/friends etc. did not read me carefully, which made them misunderstand me, and their uncontrollable feelings and wrong behaviour when speaking wrongly behind my back, opposing me, being sad etc. were transferred directly to me as the worst suffering a man has ever gone through. They did not have to read to understand because “it goes without saying that he MUST be crazy when he claims to be the Son of God”, but this is where you were wrong :-).
  • The darkness of my family etc. represented the sins of mankind, which was brought to me – with the Holy Spirit and God inside of me – as sufferings, which would either save or terminate the world. I had to endure ALL sufferings of my family/friends etc., which was MUCH stronger than I, and I had to decide to NEVER GIVE UP to go through impenetrable and unbearable sufferings for every single second to save the world from a new Big Bang.
  • My family/friends etc. would NEVER have behaved ignorantly and wrongly in relation to me if they had known about the extreme sufferings it brought me the same way as the world would not have sinned if you knew that you were terminating the world. Now when you know, will you please show a clean heart and follow me to our New World?
  • Ultimately, the darkness was defeated because the love of my family/friends etc. allowed my writings to remain in public.

Below follows the full version of this page.

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Introduction

My sufferings were invisible to people, who believed I was doing “fine” even when I was dying (!) – this memo is written with much suffering with the energy of a 90 year old man

This memo describes much of the sufferings of my life on my journey to enable my spiritual inner selves of my “old self” – the spirits of my mother and father, i.e. the Holy Spirit and the Creator – to reconnect with the Source in the summer of 2010 and to create a New World in 2011 in order to save the world and eventually to revive my previous self, the soul of Jesus, from out of “nothing” and for “him” to become my “new self” in continuation of the finalisation and publishing of this memo, which is the end of my work and journey!

The memo has been a long time on its way because for a long time I decided not to focus on my self and my own sufferings, which I thought you can read from my scripts, but since my scripts fill more than 5,000 pages and people may be interested to get an overview to understand my sufferings and also to obtain faith in me, I decided to write the memo and on the way also to overcome the worst and that is EXTREME sufferings including feelings of disgust to write it, lack of energy – I am told that when writing the memo, I only have 30 to 40 percent of the energy of a normal man or equal to that of a 90 year old man (!), and still this is much more than my condition earlier in 2009-2011, when I was truly more TIRED than you can imagine (!) – and immense impatience given to me, which means that writing about my sufferings to make you understand is part of my sufferings itself with the deeper purpose to help bringing energy to resurrect my previous self Jesus as my new self as you will be able to read from my scripts on my website.

After deciding to write about my sufferings, first I thought that the memo would become a new webpage of the same length as my webpages on “normal life”, “behaviour and work” etc. but before I knew of it, it became more than 100 pages – and still I have excluded sufferings, which you can read from my scripts – and as a consequence of the length of the memo, it is now uploaded to my site at www.scribd.com/stigdragholm/documents and from here embedded to my website at https://stigdragholm.wordpress.com/my-sufferings – and when finishing the memo, I decided to bring all of it on my website too divided into subpages :-).

I have written the memo not with the purpose to receive your compassion, but to make you objectively understand my sufferings, which have been given to me (almost) “invisible” for my surroundings to see, which made it “impossible” (for the darkness of) people around me to understand that I was suffering worse than anyone in history (!) because when people only looked at and understood the surface of me and the work I did – my writings, hard physical work at the park etc. – and the control I had over my self and my home etc., I had to be doing fine in their “simple minds” (!), because how could a man being more dead than alive be able to do the very hard work I did for years (?), which is what people were “incapable” of understanding when not doing what it takes to truly understand people, which is to dig deep, COMMUNICATE – really read/listen and understand – but this is nevertheless what I did.

Thus, most people thought I was doing fine, at least under the circumstances, without being “able” to understand – because of their own strong voice misleading them and their poor communication skills – that I was constantly dying for years, and at the same time as their misunderstandings and wrong behaviour in relation to me were killing me, this is what saved me because if they had known that I was truly dying, the darkness would truly have finished me off!

My impossible mission to write DIRECTLY of wrong doings of man without being brought down

The task I was sent on was an impossible mission. My purpose was to STRAIGHT OUT tell the world, represented by my family/friends, how wrongly you behave to make you understand your wrong doings, to follow my teachings and to make you believe in me as the Son of God without preventing me from my task because of your negative and uncontrollable feelings trying with everything you had to remove my public and “very uncomfortable” writings on you, which would be the same as killing me and the world.

Everything I did, I did in the public eye, which gave the darkness inside of my family, friends, employers and the official system of Denmark all “opportunities” to prepare a public execution of me – without informing me – focusing on my “negative” writings on them instead of understanding the big picture.

My family/friends etc. misunderstood me and their uncontrollable feelings were transferred to me as the worst suffering a man has ever gone through

In the old world, all good feelings and happiness between people spread among people through spiritual channels bringing healing and joy as the result, and all wrong and negative feelings did the same bringing darkness and pain to people you thought negatively of or behaved wrongly against.

Every single time my loving mother – who unknowingly was the one creating most of my sufferings and that is even though she always “only want the best for me” – my father, family, friends, employers, the Commune etc. were sceptical, critical, misunderstood me because of their “inability” to understand, were negative/desperate because of what they thought was my “negative” writings, wrongly thought that I was crazy, spoke poorly/wrongly of me behind my back, were sad, selfish without helping me, breaking my basic rules etc., their wrong feelings and behaviour were transferred directly to me as darkness with almost no sleep and the Devil killing me for years through sexual torments and the worst direct spiritual voices/visions/feelings given to me constantly making every single second since 2004/05 unbearable to go through, and the more I tried to make my self understood, the more misunderstandings, opposition and negative feelings I received – from an increasing number of people – and the worse my sufferings became.

Some people (my closest family) became “desperate” trying “everything” they could – before giving up – to make me understand what they were convinced about was my craziness/wrong doings and as time went on, even more people became (extremely) negative or even desperate because of what they thought was my “aggressive” and “negative” writings on them even though I only wrote the truth about their poor behaviour or work, which they could not “bear” to see published (family, friends, employers, the Commune etc.) and an even greater number of people (including other friends, ex-colleagues etc.) simply became “sad” because of what they believed – without truly reading and understanding me – that I had lost my mind because “it goes without saying that he MUST be crazy when he claims to be the Son of God”.

However, the story is as simple as this: I was NOT crazy, I was writing “the truth” exactly as I received it spiritually, which was a reflection of how my family/friends etc. chosen to represent the world is today – telling the truth or lies and behaving correctly or wrongly – and consequently I received both the truth and also much deception spiritually (!), but it was the world and not me, who was “crazy” when it could not and would not understand the simple truth by following my MANY encouragements to read my scripts carefully in order to understand. The wrong voice of most people were overpowering them and keeping them from doing what was right, which simply was to read and understand!

I had to go to Kenya in 2009 to find “original” people without the immensely strong voice of selfish people of the rich world in order to find people, who would believe so much in me that they would follow my request to READ and UNDERSTAND in order to obtain faith in me, which is what I encouraged all to do telling them that this is what they would obtain and the few people who decided to do it, achieved exactly what I told them, faith (!), which was also a condition to save the world.

But for selfish people in Denmark, this was “totally impossible” to do (!) because they were absolutely convinced that I had to be crazy, which also included my own family! My old reputation of being trustworthy and their love to me was NOT enough to make them read and understand – even when I was dying because of starvation in 2010, which was designed for them to see and understand (!) – and instead they continued to show selfishness, misunderstandings, negative and uncontrollable feelings, which was killing me, but of course they continued to only want the “best” for me without being able to control their negative voice and strong feelings and again, this was even when I encouraged them many times to focus on reading me and understanding objectively! They were deaf!

I was dying for years because of my family etc., which I wrote about in my scripts for you to see (!), and even though it was designed to be pretty easy for you to understand, you could not understand me when you decided to trust your own ignorant voice and when only scratching the surface – and I may repeat myself, but this is how strongly my disgust was when I was dying and people still could not find out how to help, which simply was to follow my recommendations.

This is ALSO to teach the world that some of the worst sufferings of man today is the mental suffering of people misunderstanding and blaming each other making your lives a Hell in order for you to understand that you TRULY need to improve your COMMUNICATION skills to understand people and to become happy.

Darkness of my family etc. represented the sins of mankind brought to God as the soul inside of me as sufferings, which would save or end the world

This was the Devil of the world brought to me because my family/friends etc. have been “designed” to represent the unbalance of the world in order for me to take on (a large part of) the sins of mankind to avoid the world from breaking down, which is what I have done ALL of my life and not only since my spiritual openings in 2004/06 or since I published my writings the 1st February 2010, but it has surely become increasingly worse all of the way.

When reading my memo you should understand that as my “old self” – before opening up my eyes as my revived previous self Jesus still under my name as Stig – I was a normal human being on the surface but my soul was not made up by a “normal soul”, but by a combination of the spirits of my mother and father or in other words by the Holy Spirit of the world and the Creator, the Source or God if you will. This is why I received the sins of mankind and at the absolute end of times, my actions and strength as a normal human being was determining whether the world would be saved or cease to exist being replaced by a new Big Bang.

When my mother’s lung collapsed in 2009, when ALL of my energy was removed in 2009 making me “this close” to dying and when my mother received an aggressive cancer in 2010, it was signs of the world collapsing because I received more darkness than I could bear, and that is “almost” because we came through after all :-).

I took on the sum of all sufferings of my family, friends, employers, ex-colleagues and the system and I kindly ask my family etc. to remember that your sufferings because of me was about to “destroy” many of you with some of you being desperate and on your extreme edge of breaking down when giving just about EVERYTHING you had “against” me (!) not realising that your (extreme) feelings were brought directly to me as darkness with the same strength and as mentioned, I had to survive the sum of all of your feelings/negativity in order to save the world.

The darkness was MUCH stronger than I, I had to NEVER GIVE UP to save you from a Big Bang

The combined darkness of all of my family/friends etc., thus the world, was MUCH stronger than I and I felt the layer upon layer of the voices/wrong doings of people I was fighting simultaneously until it became so dark, impenetrable and unbearable that I received very strong feelings and visions of a Nazi monster inside of me ready to strike again and doing everything to convince me to take the decision of ending the world by “pushing the button” of the Doomsday weapon, which only I could decide – as a normal human being – bringing a new Big Bang as the result. This was the goal of the darkness, and what it did everything it could – through mankind – to bring me on my knees to accept doing.

This was the darkness of my family and friends representing the sins of mankind – war, killings, crime, wrong conduct of life , sexual indecency etc. – destructing God, the Universe and life itself, this was mankind terminating our world because of your wrong conduct of life and this is what was “impossible” for me to bear for every single second for years without dissolving if it was not because I decided that I would never give up and outlast this no matter what.

I received the worst torture a man has ever received around the clock, but my tormentor/executioner – my family/friends etc. – could not force me to change my mind, and even when I was completely broken down crossing my pain limits MANY times and the darkness had overtaken me (!), I decided not to give in and NEVER to become negative/destructive as the darkness constantly tried to “force” me to be – for example when giving me the “kill, kill, kill” command (!) – which would have started the end of the world.

This memo will NEVER be able to tell you just how immensely awful the worst Hell is to go through, and not even my scripts both because I am not able to write the details of exactly how disgusting it feels like and because you are not able to imagine just how it may feel like, so all I can say is: Imagine your absolutely worst and then amplify this many times!

I was strong enough to go through this extreme Hell because of my personal will power and because wrong doings of people in relation to me all of my life had prepared me by making me mentally “immensely strong” – I had taken just about anything before my journey seriously started in 2004/06 and especially from 2009 (!) – and this is not because I am stronger than other people, but only a matter of “training”.

Eventually I was strong enough because I DECIDED to be stronger than the “much stronger darkness” because I took the attitude that I don’t want the Devil to win even “one set”, because I was afraid that if my barrier would be broken once, it would weaken my resistance and make it easy for the Devil to keep doing this, which would have made ARMAGEDDON a fact. I did not realise at the time of the immense impact of this decision and to be able to keep it, but today I know that this was a matter of “to be or not to be” for us all.

If you knew that wrong conduct and lack of faith would mean the end of the world, you would NEVER have done wrong!

My family/friends etc. could simply not believe in me, I had to be “crazy” without understanding that they were the crazy when deciding to believe in their own compulsory thoughts instead of deciding to follow my encouragements to read or even speak to me with an open mind with the purpose to understand me rather than to misunderstand me.

People did not have faith in me and acted wrongly even though they only wanted the best for me. If they had had faith in me and behaved correctly in relation to me, I would have received light only without sufferings and spiritual deceptions. If they had known that their wrong doings and lack of faith was tormenting and killing me, they would NEVER have done as they did.

Instead they would truly have read my scripts carefully (!) in order to obtain and maintain faith in me and behave correctly, which normally is what is required in order to save the world (!), but because of the situation where we had to reconnect with the Source and create a New World requiring EXTREME energy, the spiritual world was designed as a mirror of the physical world to “benefit” from all of the wrong doings and suffering of mankind, which also meant that the more darkness I received – and could withstand – the easier it was for my inner spiritual selves to achieve these goals, and I decided to write as directly as possible without being afraid of the Devil, which gave me maximum suffering in return, thus maximum energy to the other side.

If the world had known that it was digging its own grave because of its sins, it would of course had decided to behave. If you knew that you were killing yourselves, you would have improved your behaviour doing what is “simple logic” to do as I write about! Do you think that you will be able to improve now that you know and to show a clean heart to follow me to our New World?

Everything was based on misunderstandings, and in the end LOVE was victorious

As you will understand, all of my sufferings were basically based on misunderstandings and feelings of my family/friends etc. – this was the recipe to save the world (!) – and we succeeded to defeat the darkness because LOVE as the foundation of all life was the strongest in the end. My family etc. were ”desperate” because of me and desperate to remove my public writings, but in the end, I was allowed to keep my writings publicly because I was stronger and/or worked better than they and ultimately because of the mutual love of my family/friends etc., which was stronger than the “uncontrollable hate” of the darkness.

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Negative energy brought me the WORST sufferings

Read this, the next page of my sufferings here.

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This website was first published November 12, 2011, and has since been updated few times.

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